Wednesday 21 June 2006

Secret German Rocket Base Uncovered!

Hello Everyone,

Ace reporter Maksim-Smelchak reporting from the TMP Conference in Europe...


A secret German rocket base has become a major issue of contention at the conference... learn more about it here:

Maksim-Smelchak out...


Asian Pirate takes to the Air!

The infamous Malayan pirate Sandokan has aquired himself an aerial conveyance!

Reports just in indicate that the Black Anarchist Fleet has delivered to this menace a fearful weapon to assist him in preying on international aerial traffic. Nothing is now safe from this inhumane butcher!

John V's imagination is the source of this creative model - a Cutlass spar torpedo vessel by Brigade Models. Tiger flag is home-made. Nice one John!

Monday 19 June 2006




Fragmentary reports have been arriving at our Khartoum office of the running battle being fought against the Turkish invaders across the Nile Delta and up to the very gates of Cairo. Many details have yet to emerge from this calamitous event and so this report will be a summary of the main points. At his stage, so confused is the situation we are not even sure which units are deployed where. Such is the intensity of the fighting that many units have been unable to contact their respective headquarters for orders and wholesale uncertainty is hampering all attempts at organising any meaningful counterattacks.

To attempt to give our readers an insight into the fraught situation currently engulfing the Nile Delta we have carefully selected two reports ‘hot from the fight’ so to speak, from which a picture may be constructed of the calamity facing our gallant servicemen. This action has been approved by the War Cabinet to whom this journal, and its readers, extend their most sincere and grateful appreciation.


“My troop was engaged in a forward reconnaissance some distance from the canal. My command consisted of some eighty troopers and I was inordinately proud of their turnout and manly bearing. It was first light on the day in question and I was about to partake in my breakfast prior to resuming the patrol of the forward positions when an immense bombardment rained down from the East Bank. The shells screamed overhead; well to the rear of our position and I immediately gave the order to break camp and prepare to move out. Within a thrice the men were mounted and breakfast was but a distant memory. It was whilst the barrage was roaring overhead that I first saw the dreaded war machines of the enemy lumbering towards us. With great gouts of steam pouring from their funnels and making hellish clanking and squeaking noises; these iron giants lurched ever closer. Needless to say, the horses became skittish and the men were having difficulty in controlling them. I was debating the best way of flanking and taking one of these beasts when the wretched thing began firing at our proud and defiant troop. The men were magnificent; standing proudly as shot and shell and then maxim fire began to play upon that valiant band whilst I considered our options for the attack. The casualties began to mount and, having seen sufficient of the composition of the attacking force to be able to report to my HQ, I reluctantly gave the order to disengage as out attack would have little chance of success. We would have another chance to take one of these machines in due course I was sure of that; still it was a damned nuisance having to leave such unfinished business! Our journey back to HQ was a thrilling dash from cover to cover; hotly pursued by exploding shells and gunfire from giant airships flying so low that you almost touch them. We had lost no more men when at last we arrived at what had now become the rearguard. We were tired, angry and defiant and ready to take the worst that Mr.Turk could throw at us, given half a chance. Alas! We were to form part of the cavalry rearguard whilst the main body of the army fell back towards Cairo, so our opportunity for revenge for our gallant fallen would have to wait for some other time”.

What pluck! What courage! This unnamed officer has provided a shining example of all that is bold and resolute in the face of the enemy. Whilst shot and shell wreaked its bloody carnage all around him, he coolly considered the options for attack with no thought for his own safety. Such is the stuff of which empires are won!

Our second report comes from an altogether different source. From the other end of the social spectrum a simple cockney artilleryman, the backbone of Her Majesties Forces and the salt of the earth. From a modest and humble background, uneducated and of little or no pretensions to be other than that which fate has ordained; this artilleryman also has a tale to tell. It is a tale of simple heroism, of doing one’s duty in the face of the enemy and with no fuss or bother.

“Lawks, it was a rum do an’ no mistake. There we was, deployed in a forward position, stuck out in the middle o’ nowheres when the balloon wen’ up. Our six guns were set up just below the ridgeline wiv’ only the officers up front. It was ‘ot and we was gaspin’ for a brew. Then the ‘eavens opened. It rained shot an’ shell and me mate Nobby on number two reckoned he ‘ad’nt seen anythin’ like it since ninety eight. The shells were going over’ead an we was bein’ quiet like (still gaspin’ for a brew!), when the Captain galloped over the hill down to the battery. “Make ready with H.E., range one farsand yards,” he shouts. So we loaded double quick and got ready. Then we saw a first look at ‘em. Huge great fings they were, all steamin’ an clanking wiv flags flyin. I aint never seen anything like that before and it fair shook me rigid it did. Still, we kept at it and waited for the signal to fire. Then it ‘appened. A great airship swooped down out of the sky and started giving us some Maxim fire. Straight away men and ‘orses began to fall all about as the great steam machines ‘eaded straight up the slope towards us. Then it was madness as the machines opened up with guns and Maxims. Explosions, fires, screams and death there was as they lumbered up the hill. Nobby copped it early on – I told ‘im to be careful, the silly begger but ‘e ‘ad no chance against the machine. My gun got off around a dozen rounds before it jammed. By now they was on top of us, shooting left an’ right. Our Captain (a proper gent ‘e was) was standing, ‘is arm in a sling, firing off his revolver at the nearest of the brutes when we was overrun. He was a brave man alright, game to the last. There was nuthin’ I could do so I ‘id behind an upturned wagon and hoped they would pass by. I stayed put for ages, waiting until it was quiet. After the battle ‘ad moved away, I crept out to see if anyone was left alive. It was ‘orrible, all bits of broken guns an’ wagons and dead everywhere. I fink some of the crews was captured but I can’t be sure. The troop flag was still flyin’ so I took it down and stuck it in me pack – the Turks were not gettin’ their mitts on it, not if I ‘ad anythin’ to do wiv it! I ‘ad a quick butchers around and grabbed some gear – water and a rifle and made my way in the direction of the army. All I saw of our side was some cavalry, gallopin’ away from the machines, so I kept low and took it easy like. The journey back was a case of dodgin’ enemy patrols and lying low. Two days later I was picked up by a patrol and taken back to Cairo. I’ve still got the flag and when I get assigned to a new battery I’ll make sure they know how I got it an’ I’ll tell ‘em ‘ow we will get the scores even with Mr Turk. I owe me mates that.”

Both of these tales serve to show just how strong the mettle of our brave and plucky servicemen is; how, even in the midst of battle, unshakeable courage and resolve are the watchwords of Her Majesties Forces in the field.

However dark and troubled the path to victory is, whatever nefarious deeds and unspeakable beastliness our enemies may devise; there will always be the stalwarts of the Empire to shine the light of freedom in the heart of darkness.





The War Cabinet has issued the following communique and we have been instructed to publish the contents contained therein in their entirety.

"At 3 O’clock this morning, GMT, the armed forces of the Ottoman Turkish Empire launched a massive and surprise attack against Imperial positions along the Nile Delta in Egypt. This coincided with large-scale assaults against positions along the Suez Canal, in conjunction with indiscriminate bombing raids directed at Port Sudan, Cairo, Port Said and Khartoum. Air attacks were also reported against naval installations as well as several military and civilian aerodromes. The attack on the Nile Delta was carried out by crack Jannisary formations and was supported by heavy Land Ironclad regiments and with close aerial support provided by the Ottoman Air Fleet. Fighting has been very heavy and in spite of operating under the dual handicaps of being both severely outnumbered and having been taken completely by surprise, Imperial forces have inflicted significant losses on the invading formations. For tactical reasons it has been deemed necessary for the Imperial forces currently in action to retire to alternate positions, thereby maintaining communications with the Sudan Field Force."

"Details of the various attacks are at the present time, unconfirmed, but it is almost certain that the Suez Canal has in fact, fallen. Imperial troops are understood to be falling back under extreme pressure along the entire length of this vital waterway; as a result of this units of the Red Sea Fleet have been placed on full alert. Similarly, both the Sudan and the Somaliland Field Forces have been mobilised with all leave being cancelled and the program of receptions planned to celebrate the arrival of the Australian Squadron has been, regrettably, postponed."
"Reinforcements are being despatched from all corners of the Empire to increase the size of both the Sudan and Somaliland Field Forces; prior to the commencement of operations against the Turkish aggressor. As a result of these attacks; Her Majesties Government has announced that unrestricted hostilities against the said Turkish aggressor are to commence forthwith."
"Further details will be made available at the appropriate time."

The editorial staff of this august journal would like to remind our readers that prior to this unprecedented development the forces of Her Britannic Majesty were operating at a much lower scale of operations. In fact, it would be fair to say the scale of military and naval activity was more within keeping with the role of an international policeman. It is true that a state of war existed between the Empire and that of the Turks but with certain, clearly defined conditions applied. The resultant agreement was unique in international diplomacy and was intended to serve as a model by which minor disagreements between nations could be resolved without the full horror of wholesale military action taking place. By mutual agreement, hostile activity was limited to the Red Sea area and both powers saw fit to ensure, by the most strenuous means possible, that the spectre of escalation was kept firmly in check. Indeed, both powers actively discouraged allies from taking common cause in this affair. Clearly the Government of the Sublime Porte saw fit to honour these obligations only for as long as was convenient whilst they were secretly making their nefarious plans.

By their damnable action; callously executed with scant regard for the protocol of international diplomacy and fairness, they have demonstrated to the whole world that they are incapable of observing the most basic principles of decency and honour associated with a civilised nation.
The editorial staff of this august journal staff have also made strenuous efforts to ensure that as many lines of communication from the theatre of war are kept open for as long as possible, in compliance with the request of the War Cabinet.

Further details will be published as soon as they are available.


Friday 16 June 2006

MJ-12's Iron Stars & Pre-WWI Economies!

Hi Everyone,

Ace reporter Maksim-Smelchak reporting from the MJ-12 Economic Conference in Paris regarding Iron stars Aetherships and pre-W.W.I. economies...

Other recent news includes the latest on China's revitalized fleet.

Please check all of this out and more at the MJ-12 forums:

Ace reporter Maksim-Smelchak out!


Monday 12 June 2006

Martello Tower Models

Paper Shipwright is a publisher of high-quality paper/card models. They have some great card models for sale, including these two excellent Martello Towers. You will find that the preview pics (which are free) are well sized for Aeronef and other Naval period games!

South Coast Martello Tower:
(mounts a single 24 pdr gun on a 360degree traversing carriage)

East Coast Martello Tower:
(mounts a large gun and 2 smaller cannonades in a cloverleaf style)

Sunday 11 June 2006

Zeppelin Archive

A great resource for fans of Dirigibles everywhere!

Saturday 10 June 2006

Massacre on Mars!

Her Majesty's Government this morning received a priority ethergram from the Commander of the Martian Expeditionary Contingent:

"I am saddened to report that the Mars expeditionary force sent by Her majesty's Government to the Red planet on June 3rd suffered a massive defeat at the hands of the Helium city guard and their nefarious Prussian allies."

It seems those Prussians stick their noses in everwhere! More details of the engagement can be found here at Patrick's Hobby Shed Blog:

I am so envious of that awesome Iron Giant figure Colonel! And great models all round. Its pics like these that keep me dithering between 15 and 25mm for large scale VSF...

Friday 9 June 2006



The following report has been made available to this journal from the War Cabinet. We have been requested to observe their conditions in respect of publishing the same, on the grounds of avoiding compromising any operations that may be in progress or are being planned. Both the Proprietors and the Editor of this journal are more than happy to comply with this request; furthermore, they have arranged for any such communications to be reviewed by the War Cabinet prior to publication. The Freedom of speech, the right of every subject of her most Gracious Majesty, has been in no way undermined by the imposition of these conditions which have freely and readily been accepted by the aforementioned officers of this journal.


"We travelled by night. The indifferent stars shone down on our progress with imperious contempt; as we laboured across limitless and unseen horizons to an uncertain goal. We travelled lightly, with no more than sacks of flour and dates and skins of water for sustenance – meagre victuals for our purposeful meandering. We carried only personal weapons – rifles, pistols and for those of a more noble temperament, swords. We had no artillery, no signals, no staff, no quartermaster, no pomp and no circumstance. Such things would have been worse than useless and we hurriedly abandoned such notions as rubbish and beneath our level of existence. We carried no flag and marched behind no band; such petty concerns were the instruments of an organised body and we had no such aspirations. Our loyalty was to each other; the fettering of honour that all men must submit to when faced with adversity. These moral shackles, given freely so that all of a single purpose could pursue a common cause without fear or doubt, became our creed. The social codes and etiquette; so dear and essential in my own time and place were an irrelevance; a sham which had no place under the deserts brazen sky. I had to discard them, and consign their conscious restraint to the recesses of my soul. Into this alien world, so different from my own, I was placed."

"Our mission was a familiar one; the execution an almost mechanical routine. We had an appointment with a railway line; no doubt marked on some officer’s map and with an inflated sense of value of that time and place. Twenty men of the Howeitat, Ali, Hamed and myself made our way by easy stages to the designated point. Several times we saw Turkish Airships, vast bloated things, the colour of dried camel dung and droning like a swarm of flies; the limp flag of the Ottomans always flying at their masts. In the azure blue sky they were easy for our party to see and they either failed to notice us or ignored us as an irrelevance. Patrols of troops caused us more concern but we were able to take advantage of places that no sane army would penetrate; the boulder - strewn slopes and twisting valleys that spelt death to the unwary or unprepared. The Turks assiduously avoided such places; much to our relief and benefit. The camels would protest vehemently and would need to dragged by their head stalls in order to comply with the wishes of their berating masters."

"Finally, after a journey lasting several uneventful and monotonous days, we arrived at our destination. Our arrival was at first light and we had determined to place the charges and be away from the inevitable enemy reaction during the following evening. This meant lying up for the day nearby, with the railway under observation. We would make no move until the day was well advanced and would retire from the scene during the hours of darkness to a safer observation point to witness the effects of our handiwork. This was our pattern and served as a regulation for our efforts. Practise and experience provided the instruction we needed and not that taken from works of theory. The charges were laid – a party of ten men and myself whilst the remainder covered us with the single Lewis gun and rifles, as well as guarding our life-giving camels. A pressure switch that incorporated a unique feature in that they were also steam sensitive operated our explosive devices. This meant that the old trick of placing a flat bed truck laden with slabs of rock would not serve to activate the explosive. Vented steam from an engine, together with the weight of the associated tender would however, do so. The steam switch could be used or ignored, at the discretion of the saboteur. We were after engines alone so had ours permanently engaged. The charges were laid and we were preparing our camp prior to departure when one of the lookouts announced that a Land Ironclad was heading along the line (the Turks had been using these monstrous vehicles for some time in this fashion) towards the point we had just mined. Despite their usually suicidal bravery in battle the men of the Howeitat were reluctant to face such a machine in battle. They considered such a device as an affront to man and went in mortal dread of them. We had no choice in the matter other than to stay as any attempt to escape from our refuge would be instantly seen and we had no illusions as to how long we could last under an assault from such a leviathan. We had to sit tight, to stay exactly where we were and hope that not only did they not see us but that also they had no accompanying infantry."

"Nervously we waited, the iced barb of fear in our stomachs and with throats parched with the desert sun and pure fear. The great machine, clanking noisily and belching great clouds of steam, trundled inexorably towards the spot we had mined. The ground beneath us shook and shuddered as the huge iron beast bore down on us. The strain was intense; the stomach – churning fear of sudden and violent death hovered over us like a waiting bird of prey. The slightest movement and we would be discovered. It then became too much to be borne by mere flesh and blood. One of the Howeitat; driven mad by the tortures of thirst and the prospect of impending death leapt to his feet, drew his scimitar and mauser pistol and with a screaming battle cry, ran down the scree – covered slope to attack the Turkish vehicle."

"He had not gone fifty yards when the great machine stopped and a machine gun hammered out its message of sudden death. His body tumbled to a halt at the foot of the scree, a lifeless jumble of cloth and torn flesh. Some shouted orders were heard coming from the conning tower of the vehicle and the great engine revved to a more urgent tone, belching and hissing with great gouts of steam as it swung about to face us in our woefully inadequate shelter. Before we had a chance to do anything by way of a reaction there was a mighty explosion. As the great machine had pivoted to face us it has obviously driven on to one or more of our mines. The act of revving the engine to give more power had caused steam to be vented straight under the machine, directly on the mines thereby emulating the action of a train. A huge cloud of smoke and showers of debris poured from the sky all around us. As the dust settled and the strident ringing in the ears subsided we were able to view the full extent of our damage. The Land Ironclad lay on its side diagonally across the railway, its destroyed innards belching thick black smoke into the clear desert sky. Small popping noises issued from within as the small arms ammunition caught fire. We stared, stunned by the enormity of our actions."

"Cautiously we approached the destroyed engine – from curiosity as much as anything when a small hatch clanged open. We stood, rooted to the spot as a Turkish officer, clearly dying, attempted to drag his shattered body from the wreckage. The spell broken by his movement, Ali shot him twice and he fell dead, slumped over the hatch. Smiling, Ali walked over to the dead Turkish officer and took his pistol from his hand and his fire scorched fez. Our own man was still alive but was clearly fading fast. His body was torn by the impact of many bullets and his skin was grazed and bleeding. We stood around him and, as if by our collective willpower we could save his life we helplessly watched him pass. Hamed broke the silence "It was his time, we will take his price." We gathered our belongings and after burying our recently departed brother made ready to depart."

"We were twenty three and now twenty two. Our number was reduced by the merest whole denomination. The reassuring creak of the camels saddles assuaged our anguish as we headed away. The pulse of life throbbed inexorably on and the indifferent heavens mocked our grief over such a mean and petty affair; unworthy of notice or recognition…..……."

Our readers must bear in mind that this report has been compiled in conjunction with the War Cabinet and the strictures observed therein. As part of this agreement we are unable to furnish the name of the officer in question although informed sources have hinted that a possible decoration may be awarded.






Amidst scenes of great jubilation and tumultuous cheering, our gallant brothers in arms from fair Australia entered the naval dock at Port Sudan to commence immediate operations against the Turks. The squadron, flying the flag of Rear Admiral Ramsey, consists of the Heavy Monitor Cruiser H.M.A.S Castlemaine (squadron flagship) and her escorts the Light Monitors H.M.A.S. Hobart and Townsville. Also present are the Fixed Wing Tender H.M.A.S. Woomera and the light escorts: Platypus, Koala, Wallaby and Wombat. The three Aquanefs previously mentioned as forming part of the Australian contingent are thought to be on station but due to events off Yenbo reported earlier are believed to have been deployed immediately on operations. After a rousing arrival, including a stirring rendition of Waltzing Matilda delivered by the massed bands of the Royal Marines and the Port Sudan Garrison Artillery, followed by the official speech of welcome by the Governor, Sir Archibald Melrose, Rear Admiral Ramsey and his staff headed into a series of planning conferences with their Royal Naval opposite numbers that lasted deep into the night.

The importance of the Australian contribution to the Red Sea Fleet cannot be emphasised highly enough as they are the most modern of vessels. With the loss of the two cruisers - H.M.S. Exmouth and H.M.S. Sidmouth - reported earlier, the naval strength of the Empire in this region was perilously low when compared against the Turks. The balance has now been redressed somewhat and when further reinforcements are made available from the home fleet this will increase the Royal Navies operational capabilities immeasurably.

An additional concern, and a very real threat, is the continuing need to observe the two powerful German vessels currently attending the trade fair in Dar Es Salaam. Despite their protestations to the contrary, the obvious pro – Turkish leanings of the Germans makes the Ziethen and the Bayreuth powerful pieces in the diplomatic games being played out in the ministries of the world. These two vessels, easily the most modern and powerful currently in the Red Sea, would cause a major upset in the balance of naval power should they be made available to the Turks. As mentioned previously, the Germans have repeatedly denied in the strongest possible terms that their mission is anything but a peaceful one and contrary to popular opinion, their close association with the Turkish Government is purely from an advisory and commercial capacity. Nevertheless, it has been deemed prudent by their Lordships at the Admiralty to ensure that a squadron of Royal Naval vessels is on hand to act in a similar fashion and show the flag.

On the Arabian Peninsula itself, reports are filtering in of numerous acts of sabotage being carried out by our gallant Bedouin Allies. It is also rumoured that members of the newly formed Special Arabian Service (S.A.S.) have been involved in this activities. The occupying Turkish authorities are been gravely inconvenienced by these activities and are further rumoured to be redeploying additional forces to the Hedjaz to counter this threat. Due to the highly secret nature of these activities we are, of course, only able to furnish the briefest details in order not to compromise any operations currently underway.

Further details will be made available, subject to the above caveat, as soon as we are able.



Thursday 8 June 2006




It with deep regret that this journal has to report the loss of two of Her Majesties Armoured Cruisers off the coast of the Arabian Peninsula, some fifty miles west of the port of Yenbo. The two vessels; H.M.S. Exmouth and H.M.S. Sidmouth of the Devon class were carrying out a sweep along the coast; on the hunt for enemy inshore shipping, when they were engaged and sunk by the Turkish Aquanef: Karif's Bey.

The two Royal Naval vessels had apparently surprised the Turkish vessel on the surface and moved immediately into the attack. Both cruisers proceeded to open fire upon the Turkish vessel but failed to score any telling hits before it was able to evade their attentions by diving below the surface. There then followed a very tense hour or so as the two gallant cruisers attempted to engage the Turkish aquanef with depth bombs. Using the still to be perfected Undersea Position of Vessel Cartographogram apparatus (U.P.V.C as it is known in nautical circles) the two cruisers were able to plot the position of the enemy vessel but not with sufficient accuracy to inflict a telling blow. In the meantime, the enemy vessel, with obvious designs of its own, was able to manouver into a firing postion to unleash a salvo of deadly Electric Torpedoes (known as E.T.s in naval parlance) from what appeared to be point blank range.

Alas, the two Royal Naval cruisers, in an excess of brio in their attempts to force conclusions with the enemy vessel, had neglected to observe certain basic tactical principles when in such an action and, in operating in too close proximity to one another, duly presented the spread of Electric Torpedoes with not one, but two targets.

It was ascertained from survivors that the Sidmouth was hit twice and exploded in a spectacular display of pyrotechnics. This heroic vessel was still firing at the time of the explosion - her guns being used in a vain attempt to detonate the torpedoes before they reached their target. Of the crew of some six hundred brave officers and men unconfirmed reports indicate that only around forty souls survived, clinging to what little wreckage remained.

Within seconds the Exmouth was also hit by a single torpedo. This vessel however was vastly more fortunate than her ill-fated sister. She took around three hours to finally sink and so was able not only able to lower all her lifeboats but was also able to take onboard the shocked survivors of the Sidmouth as well.

At this point the Karif's Bey surfaced and immediately despatched a skiff to offer assistance to the shocked survivors. From their own supplies the Turkish sailors handed out hot mint tea, cigarettes, kebabs and Fezzes to the Royal Naval Officers and men. They also left quantities of medical supplies and took the more seriously wounded cases with them for medical treatment. The Turkish vessel stayed in the vicinity until some local patrol boats appeared on the scene to escort the lifeboats to Yenbo and to take charge of the prisoners. It must be pointed out that in respect and acknowlegement of their selfless and humane gesture, the Royal Naval prisoners stood to attention and gave their Turkish enemies three rousing cheers as the dreaded Man of War Karif's Bey slipped beneath the waves to continue her mission.

The Admiralty is compiling a full and detailed report on this disaster which will be discussed in full at the next emergency meeting of the War Cabinet.





In a daring and dramatic rescue, the first time such a method has been employed in action, Lt. Herbert RN, Executive Officer the Royal Navy Monitor H.M.S. Chaos, was winched aboard the Medical Dirigible (‘MeDigs’ as they are known throughout the service) H.M.A.S. Pasteur for immediate treatment for wounds sustained in action against the Turks at the Aqaba Barrage. Our readers may recall that this gallant officer, completely oblivious of his own safety, rushed into the blazing conflagration of the wardroom in order to rescue many rare and valuable artefacts. This same officer, despite the intense heat and enemy shells whistling around his ears, proceeded to attempt, single-handedly, to drag the very valuable wardroom piano to a place of safety. Alas, he was stricken with a debilitating blow at the crucial moment as the gin decanter fell on his foot; rendering our hero helpless. The fire was extinguished a short while after and this gallant officer, ignoring manfully the obvious pain and discomfort of such a heinous injury, returned to his post on the bridge and only retired to the sick bay when ordered to do so by his Captain. The Lieutenant, who is believed to have broken the fifth metatarsal on his right foot, was diagnosed as requiring immediate surgical assistance that the vessels own facility could not provide. With this in mind the call went out to summon one of the newly formed Medical Dirigibles to airlift the heroic officer to safety. Within the hour the airship had arrived to take its precious cargo onboard to provide immediate succour and comfort.

With pride in their hearts and ramrod straight backs the crew of H.M.S. Chaos saluted their brave and resolute officer as he was winched into the air and back for a ‘Blighty’. In honour of this gallant officer’s bravery Captain Stewart ordered a double ration of ginger beer for his crew to be served with the evening meal of sardines on toast. The adulation in the faces of many a veteran jolly jack tar upon receipt of this humane and generous gesture was a sight to gladden the heart of all that stand true to the traditions of the senior service.

Such fortitude and sang froid is the very stuff of legend; these are the exploits upon which empires are won.

Much praise was also given to the crew of the Medical Dirigible H.M.A.S. Pasteur under the command of Captain Finlay. The skill and dexterity with which the giant airship was handled means that any of our servicemen who are unlucky enough to be injured in action will be able to take comfort that the MeDigs will soon be on hand to provide relief and succour during their hour of need. It is believed that several more of these vessels are being sent from England with all due despatch.

Finally, it appears that the scale of air attacks against our inshore shipping has increased dramatically with some fourteen separate raids recorded in the last week alone. These raids, never usually larger than three or four vessels are causing much consternation along the coast. Our own air assets are quite thinly stretched as a result of having to monitor enemy shipping and provide valuable intelligence for the fleet, and it is with steely resolve that the commander of our air forces is resisting all attempts to make any redeployment to the coastal region. This has caused a degree of unrest along the coast but we have been assured that moves are afoot to increase the anti-aeronef batteries and the early warning observation posts.
Of one thing though we can be certain. In whatever shape or form the Turkish foe decides to attack the territory or material of Her Majesties glorious domains he will be in for a pretty hot reception!







News has just reached our Khartoum office of a naval engagement two nights ago between elements of the Red Sea Fleet and the forces of Turkey at the entrance of the Gulf of Aqaba and within range of the vaunted ‘Guns of N’ah Faroun’. Despite the lack of an official communique being released by the Admiralty at the time of writing, our own sources have managed to obtain a summary of events which will, in the fullness of time, be fully supplemented by the official announcement.

It appears that a small squadron of gunboats; supported by the Monitors HMS Chaos and her sister ship HMS Mayhem carried out a moonlight sweep of the Aqaba barrage to engage and destroy the patrolling Turkish vessels tasked with the protection of this vital waterway. It further transpires that the two monitors were to provide heavy support for their smaller charges as well as ensuring that any larger Turkish vessels would be ‘kept honest’ by the weight of their combined broadside of four 9.2" Armstrong Breechloading Rifles. These would also, if the need arose, provide some measure of comfort against the unwanted attentions of the ‘Guns of N’Ah Faroun’. The voyage was made in easy stages and carried out by hugging the African coast and then cutting across the Red Sea in a high speed dash to time their arrival at the Aqaba barrage for the early hours of the morning. This was the trickiest part of the operation as it was deemed desirable to avoid the Turkish shore batteries including the aforementioned Guns of N’Ah Faroun. The journey was carried out by dint of some superb navigation on the part of the Squadron Commander and the arrival at the appointed place was made almost exactly at the time planned for the commencement of the operation. The arrival took the Turks completely by surprise and when the Royal Naval vessels opened fire on their hapless victims, it was some time before any effective resistance could be mounted. In the space of some fifteen minutes four Turkish patrol boats had been sunk and their vanquished crews seemed only too pleased to be hauled aboard the victorious Royal Naval vessels. During the course of this very brief and one-sided exchange some minor damage was sustained by HMS Chaos. Whether by chance or design the wardroom of this gallant vessel received numerous hits from small calibre weaponry and a minor conflagration broke out. This was rapidly extinguished but not before the drink cabinet was smashed beyond redemption and the contents, much to the obvious consternation of the ship’s officers, destroyed. Fortunately no casualties were sustained either in the brief enemy fusillade or the ensuing fire. Unconfirmed reports are being circulated that the Executive Officer broke his toe whilst attempting to single-handedly rescue the wardroom piano from the fire. For this gallant action, above and beyond that which is expected of one of Her Majesties Officers, the as yet unnamed hero has been subsequently recommended for a decoration. It is with some relief that we can also report that the portrait of the Queen was undamaged.

As a direct result of the ferocity of the Royal Naval attack, several enemy vessels were observed fleeing into the dark in some disarray and apparent confusion. Sometime later, a loud explosion was heard and it was assumed that the Turks had in fact, in their eagerness to avoid the vengeful guns of the Royal Navy, retreated into their own minefield!

However, whilst the assault had been executed in a highly successful fashion, the withdrawal would be a different matter entirely. It appears that Turkish surface forces attempted no pursuit of the gallant Royal Navy raiding force. At first light however, a patrolling Turkish Dirigible made contact and proceeded to shadow the plucky squadron. This halcyon state of affairs would not remain so for very long as a shortly after 9am local time, several elements of the Ottoman Air Fleet began a two hour intensive aerial assault. It was estimated that approximately twelve Dirigibles of varying sizes were used to bomb and strafe the hapless flotilla as it made its way to safety. Despite the ferocity and intensity of the Turkish attack the squadron emerged mercifully unscathed. Several near misses were recorded and some minor casualties sustained but no fatalities. Clearly the Turkish stomach for this fight was not as earnest as when engaging lightly armed Bedouin tribesmen! It was reported that some damage was inflicted on these aerial leviathans as one vessel was seen to withdraw from the action, trailing vast plumes of smoke.

Contact with the squadron ceased shortly after the aerial action concluded (we understand that this was planned and not the result of enemy action) as they are proceeding to an unknown destination for repairs. At the last time of reporting, the Turkish Air Fleet had departed – no doubt boasting of a great success to Istanbul – and no obvious attempt at following had been observed.

The readers of this august journal can rest assured that as soon as any official account of this action is available we will endeavour, with all due haste and alacrity, to publish the same as fully as we are able.

In the meantime however, the subjects of Her Majesties domains can take comfort from the fact that once again our gallant and courageous servicemen have acquitted themselves manfully in the teeth of the battle’s roar. For as long as our Navy and the men that serve in her continue to remain true to the heritage of centuries, Britannia will continue to rule the waves.



Tuesday 6 June 2006

Martian Tripods Illustrated

I found this cracking forum today with loads of great pics of the dreaded Invaders...





Since the outbreak of hostilities in the Middle East the merchant traffic of the Red Sea has been severely disrupted by the actions of the Turkish Aquanef Fleet operating from the port of Aqaba. At the time of writing some ten vessels have been captured and forced to sail to Turkish controlled ports. Aside from the loss of these valuable vessels there is also the question of the cargoes. Many vital raw materials have found their way into the Turkish war machine; to the obvious detriment of the Imperial war effort. Our sources have ascertained that the chief culprit in these abhorrent affairs is the Turkish Aquanef: Karifs Bey. This vessel, recently acquired from the Germans is described as being a purpose built commerce raiding submersible; designed with long range and heavy armament in mind. The design caused some controversy a number of years ago and was described at the time by many informed sources as "being neither fish nor fowl; the design can outshoot that which it cannot outrun and outrun that which cannot shoot at it". Our own Naval Designers were dismissive at the expenditure involved in such a design and limited use it would find in time of war. It appears in the light of recent experience that such a design is in fact a very specialised weapon and our own forces have no obvious answer to it. Our sources within the Naval Establishment have conceded that in this aspect of the war at sea the Turks have gained a temporary advantage over our own forces - no doubt prompted by the machinations of the Hun whose intentions towards this sensitive region are well known – and until such time as countermeasures have been developed this vessel will continue to give cause for concern.

In a restrained communique from the Admiralty it was announced that the Red Sea is now officially deemed a total exclusion zone. As a result of this announcement any shipping other than our own vessels operating within strictly controlled convoys (the sailing times of which will be duly reported in the Lloyds List for insurance purposes), will be deemed to be hostile and treated accordingly. This announcement received very mixed feelings from the shipping industry – the larger companies welcomed the introduction of a regularised convoy system whilst the smaller organisations were somewhat dismayed, mainly on economic grounds. In conjunction with this the Red Sea Fleet has also been tasked with the engagement and destruction of the Karifs Bey as a matter of priority.

To this end, a squadron of the Royal Australian Navy has been detached from the Far East Fleet to provide assistance in the hunt. The squadron, consisting of three Aquanefs and numerous surface vessels, including the Fixed Wing Tender HMAS Woomera is currently en route from Sydney and is expected within the week. These vessels will be placed under the command of Admiral Seymour Brookes, the commander of the Red Sea Fleet and will provide a valuable reinforcement in the area. The Admiralty further announced that aerial patrols would be increased over the coastal regions and full-scale surface sweeps would be increased to reduce the threat posed by the Turkish vessel.

It is to be noted that as far as we are able to ascertain the Turkish Commander has acted within the accepted laws of war and of the sea. At no time have any lives been endangered and he has strictly observed the correct and formal interpretation of all of its terms and conditions. Indeed, it would be foolhardy to underestimate the prowess and ability of this commander (the name of whom has been withheld for reasons of security) and it will require the utmost efforts on the part of our armed forces to prevail against this Turkish man of war. He has revived the traditions and fortitude of the corsairs of old; of Barbarossa and Dragut themselves. With his daring and chivalry he has carved a new chapter in the annals of naval history and for as long as men sail and fight either on or under the sea his exploits will be revered by both friend and foe. If it would not be deemed an affront to our gallant servicemen it is the humble opinion of this august journal that we are facing, even across the havoc of war, a bold and resolute commander.


Monday 5 June 2006

Aquanef Action

Back to more Nautical themes once again, here is a great page devoted to Jules Verne's Nautilus as depicted by Walt Disney in his 1954 blockbuster movie: 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea.

And if that wasnt enough for you, here is a great catalogue of differet Nautilus deisgns that should really get your Aquanef inpirational juices flowing!

Saturday 3 June 2006

German propaganda

The German propoganda machine has started to rattle sabres about the vulnerability of London to Dig attacks - no doubt the recent unveiling of the 7th Dirigible Flotilla has made them a tad cocky!

Come on Jerry - we are ready for you!
(Note: These pics are all original WW1 pieces. I think the first one is themost interesting, because it shows a coordinated aerial and surface attack)

Factorium on Strike!

Those damned cowardly native levies have scarpered. The cheeky blighters...

Thus, the Factorium is again on a production go slow. I have added a number of stirling links on the left sidebar to amuse you in the meantime. So surf away with a GnT is hand and I'll have some more eye candy for you soon-ish.


An exploration of debauchery, vice and other reasons to be a man!

An exploration of debauchery, vice and other reasons to be a man!