A Young Mad Scientist's First Alphabet Blocks

As Christmas approaches, you might be searching for something special for a nephew displaying early charateristics of megalomania and a penchant for science. These will surely set him on the right track to a bright future as a mad scientist!

A complete list of the images represented by the letters is as follows:

A - Appendages

B - Bioengineering

C - Caffeine

D - Dirigible

E - Experiment

F - Freeze ray

G - Goggles

H - Henchmen

I - Invention

J - Jargon

K - Potassium

L - LaserM - Maniacal

N - Nanotechnology

O - Organs

P - Peasants (with Pitchforks)

Q - Quantum physics

R - Robot

S - Self-experimentation

T - Tentacles

U - Underground Lair

V - Virus

W - Wrench

X - X-Ray

Y - You, the Mad Scientist of Tomorrow

Z - Zombies

Available here:

http://www.xylocopa.com/product/mad-science-alphabet-blocks

Mad Scientist President?

Just to prove that all is not well in the former colony (and you shouldnt have rebelled should you?), a mad Scientist is now running for President. Of course, he cant be a very good mad Scientist if he is actually going through the democratic process rather than just seizing power through some kind of doomsday device...

Just in time for the Iowa caucus and owing to the fact that I am not entirely pleased with any candidate being offered by the major parties, I am glad to announce my candidacy for President of the United States. As I recently stated on the Exile Games forum, I will be running on the Mad Scientist party ticket.

At a recent press conference, one of my carefully placed plants in the audience raised a cunningly scripted question about my stance on zombies. Here was my spontaneously pre-packaged response:

I'm glad you raised that issue. Millions of Americans such as yourselves are rightly concerned with this clear and present threat to our way of life. My voting record will show a strong and decisive response to this concern based on three key principals: preparation, research, and response.

Preparation: I have repeatedly stated that zombie survival hinges on resource management. Therefore, through tax incentives to private citizens and auto manufacturers, I will strive to ensure that every household in America is prepared with a basic survival kit including water, chainsaws for both utility and defense, lumber to board up windows, and car batteries that will insure every car made in this country will start on the first turn of the key, even in the dark with a legion of Oogie-Boogies shambling towards you.

Research: Some of my detractors have suggested that we should ban all zombie-related research. However, this would mean that Al Qaeda has won. Such strictures would weaken our nation's economy and erode our God-given right to play Prometheus in our basement laboratories. We cannot allow America to suffer from a Zombie Gap any more than we can afford a Giant Robot Gap or a Deathray Gap. In the past, those of us in the Mad Scientist party have been accused of not doing enough to ensure adequate safety procedures in our zombie research facilities based on a few isolated incidents of our studies spilling over into the general population and leading to plagues of brain-munching ghouls. I will insist on the highest attention to safety; under my budget, for every 8 billion dollars spent on zombie research, companies will be required to spend $3.79 on a really good padlock to keep the undead blighters in their pens. That ought to take care of it.

Response: In the event of the inevitable zombie breakout, I will personally parachute into the afflicted area equipped with running shoes, camouflage cargo shorts, my kukri, a pump action shot gun, and all the ammo bandoleers I can carry. Within forty-eight hours, the zombie threat will be quelled. That is my campaign promise to you.

I hope I can count on your vote in the upcoming primaries. Vote for me and I'll put a ninja on every corner and two in between. Thank you.

http://supersech.livejournal.com/32230.html

Another Dr Steel videographic proclamation!

Dear Soldiers,

We here at ToySoldiersUnite are proud to announce that Dr. Steel has just transmitted a Soldier address to wrap up the year 2007.

Visit the below link to watch our Emperor\'s speech.

http://www.toysoldiersunite.com/popups/videoplayer.php?mid=22

Dr Steel's Christmas Message

I received the following communique today:

Happy Holidays, Toy Soldiers! With the holidays now upon us, Dr. Steel has sent a special transmission from deep within his laboratory to wish us all a very merry Christmas. Thank you for helping Dr. Steel take over the world!

May your holidays be filled with joy (and robots)

Dr. Steel Holiday Greeting

Add to My Profile More Videos

Evil Plan Generator

At last - an evil genius "cunning plan" generator!
I have been waiting for this for some time...

http://www.darksites.com/evilplan.php

Things in Jars

Next to oil smeared mechanisms and steam exhausts, nothing (to me) says VSF more than creepy things in jars.. .

Here are some creepy cryptozoologcal specimens, necropathic spectregraph, and a Bio-aetheric correction device
http://www.manydeadthings.tk/

More stuff in jars here, including "how to" instructions for making your own for your laboratory:
http://aranamuerta.com/2007/02/20/witch-kitchen-jars/

Steampunk Laptop

Yep, another amazing steampunk retro!

This may look like a Victorian music box, but inside this intricately hand-crafted wooden case lives a Hewlett-Packard ZT1000 laptop that runs both Windows XP and Ubuntu Linux. It features an elaborate display of clockworks under glass, engraved brass accents, claw feet, an antiqued copper keyboard and mouse, leather wrist pads, and customized wireless network card. The machine turns on with an antique clock-winding key by way of a custom-built ratcheting switch made from old clock parts.

http://computers-review.com/steampunk-laptop/

Thanks to Karsten for emailing me this link!

Technology,... saving lives

Philosophical endeavours may still fail us at preventing armed conflict with our neighbours but technological advances may promise a decrease in loss of life as our wake through this century grows ever longer. The most important question is, how many will you order?

http://www.hydraminiatures.com/

They're finally online and active with a shop.

Awesome VSF style Cannon.

OK, its really made for Warmachine, but this artillery piece is a beauty!

It also comes pre-painted so it good to go right out of the box.

In 15 and 25mm it could be a "threatre seige cannon", but I'm also thinking that in smaller scales it could be a astronef launching cannon too. Or a Mad Scientist doomsday weapon ready to launch cholera bomblets hundereds of miles away...

You can see more of it here:

http://www.gf9.com/

Dr Steel Interview, Part 2

As you are probably aware, last week we had the opportunity to ask the infamous Dr Steel a few questions and learn more about him and his intended conquest of the world. This is Part 2 of that Interview, where the insane but lovable Doktor answers some supplementary questions. He writes:

Dr Steel: My Dear Tas,

Below are answers to your recent inquiries. I do so hope they help in your creation of this much appreciated blog.



White Wine Sauce (WWS): What exactly are you a Doctor of? Where did you study and what are your credentials?

Dr Steel: I am a doctor of spin and a professor of reality engineering. I am a Minister of Metaphysics and I have acquired my credentials online from the same university as Dr. Dre and Dr. Suess were appointed their elite status.


WWS: Many would-be World Emperors have made fatal mistakes on their road to immortality. Indeed, these have now been published into a large list of "Top things NOT to do when you take over the world" which my agents inform me has recently been brought to your attention. How will this list effect your plans and what, in your opinion, are the most important mistakes to avoid?

Dr Steel: Indeed, there have been many examples of what not to do by those who have attempted to take of the world in the past. I believe there is much to be gained from these past failures as well as much to be learned from the brief successes. Being certain to crush your foe quickly without explaining the complicated details of how you came to be and how you have decided to finish them is one of the most fatal flaws. Likewise there is much to be learned from the style of previous world domination oriented uniforms. There were some smashing designers with grand taste indeed. Shiny black is always a good choice.


WWS: Many would-be World Emperors have embraced organic familiars; Mr Bigglesworth the Cat comes immediately to mind, and keeping predatory animals such as sharks and crocodiles as a means of eliminating the unwanted. You have instead embraced artificial familiars in the form of your robot army. What is the downside to inorganic companions and what are the pitfalls of combining your friends with a mechanism for enslaving the world? Did your unfortunate episode with the poodle Baby Lu-Lu taint you at all?

Dr Steel: Though I do appreciate the natural world, I am rather opposed to the idea of "pets". Poodles are far from members of the natural world as they have been genetically altered to serve as decorative trifles and barking accessories. Such experimentation should cease immediately.

I do however enjoy my robotic experiments. Mechanical companions are grand...that is, when they work. I suppose the downside would be their frequent malfunctioning. I had one little fellow who became entangled in a bio-feedback loop resulting in its scratching a nearly un-repairable hole in my experiment room door. Though I look forward to far more efficient artificial intelligences in the near future.


WWS: What is your opinion on giant armoured airships and their uses in conquering and domination? What would you call your flagship?

Dr Steel: A good question indeed. I am rather a fan of the zeppelin, aesthetically speaking. When it comes to durability I would have to opt for flying saucers. As for a name, I believe "The Steel Beast" might be nice, or perhaps "Bad Ship Lollipop".


WWS: In return for my sworn allegiance and Commanding your aerial armada in support of the robot toy army rampaging below, may I be granted the Governorship of Australasia and South East Asia?

Dr Steel: Ah, by all means my good man. I'll even throw in a personal action figure to be molded in your honour as well.


WWS: Excellent! I cant wait to see "Action Tas" and what awesome array of acessories and weapons he comes with.

Thankyou again for your time Dr Steel. Its been another enlightening but disturbing journey through your psyche...

Dr Steel: Thank you ever so much for the grand spreading of my propaganda, my good man. I appreciate it very much



Yours in a White Wine Sauce,

Tas
Commander of Dr Steel's Aerial Armada and
Governor designate of Australiasia and South East Asia

Electrolux Death Ray!

This one is more pulp than steampunk, but its a cracker:

Brotonic Weapons presents:
The Electrolux Death Ray! "Yesterday's future...today!"


See the fantastic advertising trailer here:
http://www.brotron.com/main/main.html

I have a sudden hankering to go searching for an old vacuum cleaner now!

An interview with Dr Steel:- a White Wine Sauce exclusive!

You may recall my recent introduction of a visionary named Dr Phineas Waldolf Steel, which was detailed here:

http://pauljamesog.blogspot.com/2007/08/dr-phineas-waldorf-steel.html

I have been corresponding with the good (yet unstable and unhinged) Doctor and recently requested an email interview in which he would answer some posed questions. To my great pleasure, this dapper gentleman replied:

My dear Tas,

I would be delighted to appear in your blog.

* White Wine Sauce (WWS): What first led you to suspect your own insanity and embrace it as an ideal?

It began long ago with my daily commute to and from a small office while tolerating bumper to bumper traffic. Anyone who accepts such daily punishment certainly has psychological issues. I didn't notice this at the time, of course, and it wasn't until I was officially labeled insane by the medical directors of a psychiatric hospital that I became aware of my mental state.

Many insane people are unaware of their insanity, fortunately I was shown a graph charting my madness so it's all very clear to me now. I have embraced this fact and now utilize my own insanity to forge a new road in my life. Since one's reality is only as real as one perceives it to be, I have decided to become World Emperor.

* What will be the first ten things you do as World Emperor?

First of all I will do a monkey-like dance. Shortly thereafter I shall assemble an elite and talented crew of technicians from across the globe to begin realizing the transformation of this world; something I like to call a world "make-over".

I will then focus my attention on restructuring the educational system, followed by setting up the Neurological Android Research Facility to advance technologies in the department of artificial intelligence. Having tea with Ray Kurzwiel and Zecharia Sitchin would certainly prove to bring upon some interesting ideas, and then I shall oversee the refurbishing of the White House into a delightful, and educational, miniature golf course.

My attention will then be directed towards alternate forms of far more efficient transportation and cleaner food manufacturing. All the while, I shall be constructing giant robots to utilize as defense against the inevitable battle with The Alien Illuminati who will be rather displeased with such advancements. Lastly I would like to present a special puppet show about chinchillas.

* WWS:What is your position on extraterrestrial life and the search for it?

My opinion of extraterrestrial life is one that points to the idea that we, as humans, are the extraterrestrials to begin with. An alien presence has always been here for as long as we have been hitting two rocks together, and their intervening with the hominids on this planet resulted in the mish-mashed society in which we live. I am completely supportive of those who look for extraterrestrial life, though much of what is shown to us through the mass media is only a smokescreen in an attempt to convince us that if anything other than ourselves exists in the universe, that it is only a small microbe and very far away. When in fact, the very powers who control such information are those who came to this planet thousands upon thousands of years ago.

To find the truth, as is in many cases, we must look within...as well as underground.


* WWS: What do you think was God's biggest mistake?

Oh goodness, where to start? Humans have too many design flaws to even begin to list. Though in order to answer this question properly, we must first define "God". It seems to me that God is an idea, perhaps a feeling that there is something bigger than us in the universe. Something which plans and controls all things forever and always. To me, this sounds like a source of life, or energy, rather than a fellow with a white beard and a mean temper. Rather than God making mistakes, it seems that our general perception of God is a mistake in and of itself. As wee humans, our perception of things grander than us has always brought upon awe. As a result our "truth" hungry minds have devised a wide variety of ways to justify all things. As technology appears to be magic to those who do not understand it, humans have also etched tales of immortal gods in the stone of yesterday. Our assumed perception of the gods of antiquity are in fact the distant memories of flawed and power-hungry beings who have little to no respect for the occupants of planet Earth. To this end, many of our control oriented belief systems were established to keep "the monkeys" under control and quiet.

I feel that the idea of God is a good one in that we must maintain a perspective of there being a creative force of energy permeating reality. To become aware of this and to utilize such power is, in my opinion, the only thing really worth doing...

...aside from a monkey-like dance which is pretty fun too.


Sincerely,
~Dr. Phineas Waldolf Steel

-------

I would like to thank the good Doctor for donating his valuable time away from his music and world domination plans to answer these questions for Yours in a White Wine Sauce! I would also like to thank him for the use of the publicity photographs used in this article.

Coming soon: Dr Steel Interview, Part 2
or not, depending on how he feels and if the progress of his Toy Army permits

In the meantime, you too can enlist in the Toy Army here:

http://worlddominationtoys.com/drsteel/about/donate.htm

or you may financially contribute to the good Doctor's campaign for world dominance here:

http://worlddominationtoys.com/drsteel/about/donate.htm

Dr Phineas Waldolf Steel

.
Previous visitors may recall information posted here about evil geniuses and how to develop the necessary skills in one's spare time:
http://pauljamesog.blogspot.com/2006/05/evil-scientists-subscribe-here_03.html

Here is a man who may have read this article and taken it a little too much to heart - the website of Dr Phineas Waldolf Steel widely proclaims both his insanity and his unashamed desire to become World Emperor:

Hello, my name is Dr. Phineas Waldolf Steel and I'm crazy. At least that's what they tell me. It's a real load off of my mind too. I mean you can get away with pretty much anything if you're bonkers. It really relieves a lot of pressure and responsibility for me.

What I've noticed about being insane is the fact that most people really don't want to acknowledge insanity. You can walk down the street talking to yourself (or little dancing bears that no one else sees) and people violently avoid eye contact. "Keep walking, don't look at the crazy guy. Act like you don't see him." You become invisible because people just don't want to deal with what they don't understand. Life is too busy to try and stop someone from having a conversation with a fire hydrant. And being crazy isn't illegal. You won't even be placed into an insane asylum unless you try to hurt yourself or others (note: that also includes trying to burn down your ex-employers toy company).

There are a lot of things I like about being crazy, but one of my favorites things has to be the fact that I don't have to be anything that the world expects me to be. If I feel like crawling around on the floor and barking during a business meeting, so be it. I'm nuts. If I feel like spouting off conspiracy theories involving the Alien Illuminati or that I will one day become World Emperor, then that's just to be expected. After all, I'm complete wacko. and it's rather convenient.

But really, we shouldn't be too critical of this character. Its wackos like him who construct vast armadas of armoured aero-mobiles crewed by brainwashed morons, which naturally provides heroic adventurers like ourselves opportunities for glory, excitement, medals and seducing beautiful women. So do your career a favour and like the good doctor's website suggests:

Support Dr. Steel's plans for world domination today!

http://worlddominationtoys.com/drsteel/about/about.htm

Evil Scientists subscribe here

Top 10 Ways to destroy Earth: http://www.livescience.com/technology/10ways_destroyearth.html

The International Society of Mad Scientists
http://www.mad-scientists.org/

The Ernest Glitch Chronicles
http://www.lateralscience.co.uk/glitch/

The League of Mad Scientists
http://loms.comicgenesis.com/

Professor Widget
http://www.professorwidget.tk/

Dr Vulture's Laboratory of Evil Science:
http://www.evilscience.net/main.htm